Forum Archive Index - December 2000

[Marilyn Munroe <who.c@res.co.nz>]

Gentlemen, time
to cash in the fabulous wealth you have gathered on the New Zealand sharemarket
this year and spend it all on your partner for Christmas. What to get her?
I have this little tune in my head:

The French were bred to die for love
They delight in fighting duels
But I prefer a man who lives
And gives expensive jewels
A kiss on the hand may be quite continental
But diamonds are a girl's best friend

A kiss may be grand but it won't pay the rental
On your humble flat, or help you at the automat
Men grow cold as girls grow old
And we all lose our charms in the end
But square-cut or pear-shaped
These rocks don't lose their shape
Diamonds are a girl's best friend

...Tiffany's ... Cartier...
Talk to me, Harry, Winston,tell me all about it!
There may come a time when a lass needs a lawyer
But diamonds are a girl's best friend

There may come a time when a hard-boiled employer
Thinks you're awful nice
But get that ice or else no dice
He's your guy when stocks are high
But beware when they start to descend
It's then that those louses go back to their spouses
Diamonds are a girl's best friend

I've heard of affairs that are strictly platonic
But diamonds are a girl's best friend

And I think affairs that you must keep liaisonic
Are better bets if little pets get big baggettes
Time rolls on and youth is gone
And you can't straighten up when you bend
But stiff back or stiff knees
You stand straight at Tiffany's

Diamonds... Diamonds...
- I don't mean rhinestones -
But Diamonds, Are A Girl's Best Friends
 
 

Boop-boop-de-do Marilyn

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